Percy Jackson& the Exterminators
by LG Ally
Summary: Was initially an assignment for English class. An alternate ending to Percy Jackson&The Olympians: The Lightning Thief. This is a parody and was not intended to make fun of the book or characters in anyway! Just a short story! Enjoy! Complete Rated K plus for mild language and dramatization


"Hey, Percy." Luke said.

"Yo!" Percy replied, giving him a personalized handshake.

"I need to tell you something. Come with," he opened up a coke bottle.

Percy shrugged his shoulders and agreed. After all, what harm would a talk with Luke do?

Nobody suspected Annabeth was hiding behind a tree, eavesdropping.

"What does Luke want to tell Percy that he can't tell me?"she wondered.

Annabeth quickly decided to follow them.

They entered a forest. A coke bottle in Luke's and Percy's hand.

"Am I parched or what?" Annabeth said to herself, enviously eyeing the coke bottles.

She couldn't hear what they were saying, but suddenly Annabeth saw a scorpion about to crawl up on Percy and Luke laughing like a maniac.

_WHAT THE HECK?! _Annabeth thought.

She jumped out of her hiding place to warn Percy.

"Percy! NOOOOO!" Annabeth screamed.

Percy turned around.

"Annabeth?!"

"YOU STUPID BAFOON! GET OUT OF HERE! LUKE IS TRYING TO KILL YOU AND ALL YOU'RE SAYING IS 'ANNABETH?!' WHAT THE HECK IS WRONG WITH YOU, YOU NINCOMPOOP?!" Annabeth screamed her head off.

Out of no where, she threw Percy to the side and faced the scorpion.

"OH,terrestrial arachnid! POISON ME AND NOT THAT SEAWEED BRAIN STANDING OVER THERE!"

With a dramatic flip of her hair, Annabeth kneeled on the floor, waiting for the poisonous bite.

The scorpion glared at her, and reluctantly bit the daughter of Athena.

"WHY?! WHY, ANNABETH?! WHY?!" Percy screamed from the corner, as he witnessed the wise girl falling to the ground.

A tear slid out of Annabeth's eye.

"Because," she croaked,"...I love you..."

"NOOOOO!" Percy cried. He banged his fist on the ground, throwing things in distress.

Luke, the sadist, laughed hard, falling to the ground in hysterics.

Percy glared at him and turned to Annabeth and crouched beside her on the ground.

"Is...there any hope left," he choked out.

Annabeth grabbed his hand, squeezing it hard.

"Avenge me..." she choked out and her hand fell to the ground.

Percy stared in shock at the blonde lying still on the ground.

Suddenly his eyes blazed over and he spun around to face Luke.

"Uh oh!" Luke whispered, his eyes widened in fear.

"Better run for it, Castellan! Or you'll see Hades soon..." Percy muttered dangerously.

Luke ran for it, but sadly, not fast enough.

Percy whipped out riptide and that was the end of Luke Castellan.

"That was, er, gruesome." Percy shook his head.

Suddenly a bright light shone and Zeus came down from the skies.

"Percy Jackson, Son of Poseidon, you have killed the lightning thief. Congratulations. I applause in your honor..." Zeus rolled his eyes and listed some of Percy's more achievements."...anyway! To reward you for all your hard work done for the gods, I will reward you anything! Percy you may even become immortal. What say you, boy?"

Percy stared in shock.

"Are you asking me if I want to live forever in grief and guilt of Annabeth's death?"

"Ummm yes?" Zeus scratched his head in uncertainty.

"ARE YOU ASKING ME OR TELLING ME, BUDDY?"Percy screamed.

"I beg your pardon!" Zeus exclaimed, appalled.

"I just want to end this now," Percy muttered.

Percy ran towards a creek and jumped in, hoping to drown himself.

Alas, as the son of Poseidon it was absolutely impossible.

"Nevermind!" Percy jumped out of the creek after his hundreth something suicidal attempt.

He sighed, crouching to the ground.

_Now what should I do?_ He thought.

Suddenly a thought came to his mind.

Didn't Zeus promise him anything since he killed the lightning thief?

Well...

A slight grin formed on Percy's lips.

** (Epilogue)**

Little demigod Beth was watching TV. Suddenly an ad came on.

Percy Jackson's face showed up.

"Are you tired of those nasty spiders everywhere? Do you wish they'd just disappear? Well Percy Jackson & the Exterminators have a solution for you!" the announcers voice exclaimed.

A picture of Percy in an exterminator's costume showed up with all twelve Olympians behind him, all of them wearing the same exterminator clothing.

Zeus looked bored out of his mind.

Poseidon had an expression that hinted he'd rather be riding seahorses right now.

Athena looked more than slightly disturbed.

Aphrodite was eyeing her outfit with obvious distaste.

All the other olympians had equal amounts of negativity on their faces. Well, all except for Ares.

Ares had a vicious grin on his face as he stomped on spiders scurrying on the ground.

"Percy Jackson and the Exterminators have been killing spiders since Annabeth's death. You can be guaranteed not even a single spider will be left with these exterminators in charge."

In the background, Beth could hear Percy growl,"These aggravating creatures don't deserve to live. Especially not if Annabeth died! I will avenge her even if that means killing every single spider on this wretched planet!"

Beth laughed. This was all too hilarious! Aphrodite in a drab outfit? Zeus standing behind some demigod? Beth was surprised she hadn't died laughing.

"Hey guys!" she called her fellow cabin mates.

Too see all the Olympians like this was like seeing a blue cow. Not common. Not common at all.

A crowd gathered at Beth's cabin, everyone laughing hysterically.

The ad ended with a close up of Percy saying, "Give me Annabeth! Or give them," he pointed to the spiders, "death!"

_Meanwhile, _

In the depths of Tartarus, Kronos was forming.

"That stupid Hermes boy," he muttered when his mouth formed, "demigods are useless. He just slowed me down. Got killed by some spawn of Poseidon! Wow what an excuse. Worse than 'Cerberus ate my homework!' "

Suddenly another prisoner in Tartarus approached Kronos.

"Yo! Kro! Check this out!" the monster yelled pointing to the TV Hades had installed down there. Hades wasn't all that bad, although showing kindness to criminals wasn't exactly good.

Kronos turned to the TV. The ad with Percy was on.

"What the..." Kronos muttered.

When he saw Zeus in the stupid exterminator outfit, a deep bellow escaped from Kronos' stomache.

"Did he actually laugh?" a prisoner whispered to another.

More bellows escaped, and pretty soon Kronos was in hysterics!

"If he keeps on going on like this, he'll just explode into pieces," some monster noted.

And that he did.

_THE END_

**_REPLY TO REVIEWS:_**

**_Jewel: By who, I am going to assume you meant Percy. Percy Jackson that is. Considering that he doesn't have the power resurrect anyone (in fact NO ONE actually does) he couldn't. And even if he could...what kind of story would this be :P?!_**


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